


Puyo Puyo Tetris 99

by Caitemis



Category: Puyo Puyo (Video Games), Tetris
Genre: Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, this is literally just a tetris 99 joke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:15:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26739475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caitemis/pseuds/Caitemis
Summary: Alternative title: a 99 player Puyo Puyo Tetris match that goes as well as you'd expect.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 27





	Puyo Puyo Tetris 99

“Ringo, it’s great to see you again. Truly. But, how do I put this…” Tee frowned. One of his crew finished his thought for him.

“What are _you_ losers doing here?” Ess pointed at the elephant in the room: the dazed pile of people behind Ringo in the edge of spacetime. Actually, there was a literal elephant in the pile. Metaphor still worked. Amitie grunted and wriggled her way out from under a pink dog-centaur.

“I was playing puyo with Sig and their magic kinda got weird, ehe…” She rubbed the back of her head. One by one, the newcomers answered as well.

“Slight spell miscalculation.”

“Was trying to teach that tone-deaf bird a lesson, gao!”

“Eh? What Amitie said.”

“My power had been too stimulated in a match.”

“Gu gugu!”

“...And there you have it,” Ringo said, somehow keeping a straight face. “Kind of weird how we all got here at once. Do you think…?” Tee shrugged.

“I can’t say for sure. Ex should be able to solve this problem.” With a rowdy and confused party of… “Zed, count the people.”

“Affirmative. One… Two…”  
  


“Ugh! Now you’ve done it Tee! He’s going to be counting forever!” Ess puffed out her cheeks.

...With a rowdy and confused party of who even cares, Tee and his friends reached Ex’s usual spot. After somehow managing to answer an onslaught of questions, Ex finally gave his verdict.

“With this many people from this many worlds, it’ll take forever to sort them, much less seal the damage they cause from remaining here. A handful of people is easy, but with this many-”

“Sixty-seven, sixty-eight, sixty-nine…” The robotic voice was still droning on.

“Very nice, Zed. Let’s just say it’s too much for even me to handle. We’d need a lot of energy if we were to do this quick,” Ex said. He put his hand against the massive door in front of him as if it would give him some answer. If only he could be responsible for once…

“Pipipi!”  
  


“Gugugu!”  
  


Ex looked down at the two rotund creatures tugging at his baggy pants. Arle stepped forward and gave Ex a wide smile.

“They’re right! We can’t give up now. I’m sure with all of us together, we can find a way home!” The magician’s words were full of confidence and energy. Carbuncle hopped around Ex with more supportive “gu”s.

“Actually… Arle, that’s a great idea. Ex, how many players’ worth of power would be needed to use the power of puyo and tetris to travel back to our dimensions?” Ringo put a hand to her chin. Ex started counting on his fingers.

“Ten, twenty… about eighty, but that would need to be all at once… do you mean…?” Ex’s eyes widened. Slowly, he turned his head towards Zed, who was still counting up.

“...eighty-eight, eighty-nine, ninety, ninety-one. There are ninety-one individuals minus Ex and the Tetra crew,” Zed concluded. 

“Plus them, that makes…” Ringo muttered. A purple-haired boy chimed in with a shark-like grin.

“It’s a ninety-nine player Puyo Tetris Royale! ☆”

* * *

Having a four-way battle was chaotic enough. A ninety-nine way battle? Challenging even for the current Tetris King. Tee cracked his knuckles and prepared his board for his tetriminos. Most of his opponents chose puyos out of familiarity, but some stuck with tetris, either for a fast-paced start or sheer curiosity. He could beat Ex, so this would be easy. Ecolo - who appointed him as unofficial judge again? - raised a blobby hand.

“Ready? Remember the rules! Same as usual puyo or tetris, except choose your target! Three.. Two… One…” Tee looked around. Target…

Half the players were staring at him. _Oh. I’m in danger._

Ecolo brought his hand down, bringing an O-piece with it. “Go!”  
  


Tee’s hands moved faster than his mind. Bring these three to make a square, then make a triangle on the other side, hope for the right Perfect Clear pieces to come up, and -

His timing could not have been better, because his setup blasted away mounting garbage blocks, giving him more breathing room to deal with the next onslaught. This wasn’t the only chaos going on.

“D-down already…” That was from a pile of sentient bones.

“Gao! That’s the power of learning how to rotate! G-ack!” Draco was immediately taken down by a garbage puyo to the face.

...Yeah, not everyone was the best. It wasn’t only the weaklings tha were being taken down though. Arle was already struggling, and Amitie got absolutely dogpiled. The sounds of puyos popping and rows clearing mixed with cries of defeat and competitive banter. The range of skills was incredible and wait, why were Jay and Elle four-widing? Who taught them that? Of course they of all people would be - his dip in concentration caused a misdrop, he can still recover, no it’s piling up-

Tee, the Tetris King, was buried under a pile of gray puyos. By the time he dug himself out, the pool had shrunken to only ten players gathered around a ball of light. There was no ganging up on one player anymore. It was every player for themself. With each slow fall, Tee found himself more engrossed, until Satan and Ringo finally clashed at the end. WIth a final burst of spells…

“Calculus!”

Lightning struck the ball and engulfed the area in a bright light. Once Tee blinked the spots out of his eyes, all he was left with was his crew and the howls of the dimensional winds. Ex put a hand on his shoulder.

“You did great. I wish we could have had a few rounds more, but I suppose it was for the best. Are you sure you’re okay without having said goodbye?” Ex asked. Tee smiled at him.

“There wasn’t any reason to say goodbye, right? I know we’ll meet again someday.” Ex sighed and looked up at the shifting sky with a faint smile.

“I hope so. Friends like that are something you could never forget.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first completed fanfic and it's a joke idea that's been living rent free in the back of my mind since Tetris 99 came out. Still like how it turned out though so that's a plus.


End file.
